Traipsing   Scraping   Vaping

We “train”, we get mentally focused, we get our bodies in prime (or should it be non-prime) condition for this one event of the year…yes, the pub run. Given that we are the only hash in Hong Kong to have such an event as the centrepiece of its annual calendar really does say a lot about the N2TH3.

For the past couple of years, our performance on the pub run has not been very good, in fact it has been crap, barely scraping through 10 bars before everyone gets the last MTR home. However, this year, In the absence of the GM, GM2 Eunuch had high hopes of doing well, making sure that he had taken the following day off just in case he got a little over hydrated. Stingray also wanted to get things going early, avoiding the mistakes of previous years, by getting too comfortable in one of the early bars and then losing interest. On the subject of Stingray, he does like his singing and decided to prepare song sheets for all. Not content with singing about Shepherds washing their socks and Santa Claus “coming” in town, Stingray had three football songs at the ready, much to the delight of anyone that supports, Liverpool, West Ham or Arsenal.

And so it was:

Bar number 1: Kings Belly. This week’s scribe has decided to record this as the first bar, because most who showed up had a quick drink before the off time at 7pm. Kicking off from the King’s Belly were Bunter (Cue?), Geriatric, Luk Dim Boon, Stingray, Eunuch, Golden Balls, Liberace, QT, Big Moany and Mango Groove. After having a hastily gathered collection, Mango set off to mark the next bar.

Bar number 2: Bobby London. This bar looks exactly the same as it did 30 years ago. A glass of beer was at the ready for the crew, we were in, we were out, 10 minutes. Things were looking good as a stick of chalk was handed to Big Moany with the instruction please do not take us up and over Cloudy Hill tonight.

Bar Number 3: Hippo: Perfect. Just round the corner from the Bobby. Six bottles of Carlsberg were waiting for us which we rapidly consumed. Golden Balls received a call from Sticky, she was on the train and would be joining us soon.

Bar Number 4: TFS. Nice bar, very quiet. Once Sticky had joined us we quickly moved on. Well actually we didn’t because LDB had to run back to get his e-cigarette (something that would occur on numerous occasions throughout the evening). Now this week’s scribe has been in the UK for a few months this past year and can report that this e-cigarette thing is getting very popular, commonly referred to as vaping. You can get all sorts of “flavours” for your vaping needs, most of which smell like a cake shop. On that note, every time LDB exhaled it smelt like Starbucks…really. We were looking good, four bars covered and not even 8 o’clock.

Bar Number 5: 133 Lounge: Some quick drinking in here, Eunuch pulled out his balloons and Bunter and Geriatric were nominated to mark the next part of trail.

Bar Number 6: Bar King Lounge: we were running out of cash, so another round of collection was needed. Nobody complained, nobody cared cos we were moving baby…our training was finally beginning to yield rewards. Oh yes, LDB had to go back again for his e-cigarette.

Bar Number 7: Bar Pacific: Golden Balls got sexy on the karaoke, impressing everyone but the hash because they had swiftly moved on to the next bar once he had started.

Bar number 8: Gili Galu: This was not the same Gili Galu as previous years as it appeared to have been chopped in half, but nonetheless we got the beer, drank it and moved on.

Bar number 9: Muso: Lots of singing in this bar. QT was not impressed with our rendition of You’ll Never Walk Alone. Eunuch was hungry and so was everyone else. We needed something to “mop” up the copious amounts of beer we were drinking so Eunuch made a quick dash to Pizza Box.

Bar number 10: Beer Fish: Finally we made double figures, albeit with astronomically priced “craft” beer. Eunuch got the pizzas, we munched through them quick time and headed to the next bar.

Bar number 11: Sky: More bottled Carlsberg and more quick drinking, our pace wasn’t flagging, we were holding form and looking good. We resembled a finely tuned fighting machine, sort of a mix between the gallant fighting men from the movie 300 and that other movie Fat Boys from Feltham Green.

Bar number 12: NOC NOC: More singing in here, then Liberace had to leave as he had a job on and Stingray also left the party citing an early start the following morning. Our numbers had fallen but our spirits remained high.

Bar Number 13: Here: It was getting near 11, Geriatric had to leave as he had a fair distance to travel back to Sai Kung. The rest of us were still on our feet and then someone handed chalk to Mango.

Bar Number 14: 7-11: Thinking that it would be great to have a quick circle, Mango went into 7-11 and bought a rather large quantity of beer, stacking it on the pavement outside. It was a lovely evening and the remaining pub runners were pleased to stand outside and get a little oxygen in their lungs. It was a very jovial circle led by Eunuch and Luk Dim Boon. As the down downs were being distributed lo and behold the rozzers showed up. We noticed them but just kept going until they told us to keep the noise down, at which point we promptly headed for the next bar.

Bar Number 15: After 5: As we walked in, a group of younglings – five girls, one boy – were sitting in the corner. These were going to prove to be our undoing. The ladies were rather nice, three of them were Japanese and they seemed to take a keen interest in what we were doing. We all tried our various chat up lines, but as usual failure ensued. It was now late and we had to say goodbye to Bunter and QT. Thinking that this was the last bar, LDB ordered a round of some “dark” beer that himself, Eunuch, Mango and GB consumed quick time before GB departed with Sticky – and Eunuch announced he was going to drive home. Yes, you heard that correct. As we walked out of The After 5 in search of the Eunuch wagon, another 7-11, next to the Jockey Club, was sighted.

Bar Number 16: 7-11 Again: Rushing inside, the last men standing grabbed a quick can, drank it and then headed home. Must admit not a bad pub run: 16 establishments covered by 11 hashers.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all. – Mango Groove

BUNTER, GERIATRIC, LUK DIM BOON, STINGRAY, EUNUCH, GOLDEN BALLS, LIBERACE, QT, BIG MOANY, MANGO GROOVE, STICKY APID