Run 1826, 4 October, Sui Wo Road

Full Moon Fever

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The moon has a radius of 1737km which means that if it was covered in moon cakes there would be 7,579,128,528,000,000 moon cakes on the moon.

Hare Golden Jelly, Sui Wo up above Sha Tin … nice view but there’s too many clouds … difficult to count those moon cakes. What’s that 11 doing in the briefing markings? Oh, it’s a check back.

Up the Hill, By the Light of a Magical Moon, back down the Hill. That was it. Quite a few steps really. Certainly more steps than checks.

About 5.6km for the rambo run. At 5-metre spacing that would have required 1,120 moon cakes to set the whole run in moon cakes.

Difficult to write on on or check back with moon cakes … but then there wasn’t many .. on ons that is … and hardly any checks … except for that check back at the start that pissed us about for like 10 minutes … the time it takes to eat a quarter of a moon cake.

If you believe they put a man on the moon, it would have taken him ages to eat all those moon cakes, even with the reduced gravity. It took me ages to do the run. It took me ages to eat an eighth of one moon cake.

The Astronauts on the Moon Mission were in no particular odour or order Golden Balls, Dingaling, Eunuch, Crème de Flo … the French for moon cake is gateau de lune, in case you were wondering … some young girls, who hung lanterns round the pagoda. One caught fire.

Ground Control was left in the slippery hands of Walky Talky and Fartypants and 2 bottles of wine, whilst the heartbeat of the expedition was monitored by One Eyed Jack.

The police … giant steps are what you take, walking on the moon … kept the massed crowds back while the GM2 dispensed further moon cakes … oh yes, never put a frozen cucumber in the microwave for more than 5 minutes (come again? – Ed) … and there was eventually a nice lamb lantern which in fact turned out to be a rabbit, while among the crowds of moon gazers who invaded our space, or space invaders who invaded our moon, was a lady with a lobster on her head … all a bit confusing.

We await the photographic record of the full moons and the decision … is it moon cake or a cheese cake?  – Stingray

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Hares: Golden Jelly, Back To The Future

Runners: Creme Brulee, Eunuch, Stingray, Hard Up, Velcro Lips, Dingaling, One Eyed Jack, Golden Balls

Non-runners: Walky Talky, Fartypants

Special thanks to Tom Petty (1950-2017)

Run 1825, 27 September, Sha Tin Wai

Passing Water

LSW 2135 Sha Tin Wai 170927 7.05km
GPS of rambo trail by Hopeless

Oranguwank’s joint run with Little Sai Wan started at the same place near Sha Tin Wai station as Liberace’s infamous “Piss in Bucket” run a few weeks ago, but this time there was no little punk poisoning the water. Eight NNTers showed up and maybe 15 from LSW to make a decent sized pack. The hare promised 7km for rambos and 2.5 for wimps. The question on our lips was: how similar will this one be to Liberace’s trail?

It started identically – round the back of the MTR and up the road past the housing estate. But instead of turning right up the steps to the village, trail went on up and left until we hit a barrier and a dark road heading up through forest. As I reached the rambo wimp split, a bit behind TV Tits and a bit in front of Gunpowder Plod, Ms Tits turned round to backtrack, having missed the split. Cue the copper in Plod: “Put that light out! Kill the light! Put that bloody light out!” Always the gracious gent.

​Plod: Five hashers, including Geriatric, Gunpowder Plod, Golden Jelly and TV Tits, assaulted the wimps’ course, which involved climbing two ladders and crossing a dam. Trail then led through a semi-shiggy path directly to a check back with no preceding on on. So, after checking all around and up and down a considerable distance, no trail could be found so they reluctantly retreated back down the ladders and on home​.

Rambo trail continued up the road and then left up a boulder trackway. I figured I was the last rambo and totally out of earshot from the others, but as I plodded on up I was grateful for the hare’s wet shoe warnings, “water” scrawled here and there at standpipes and streams. This boulder trackway went on for quite some distance, up, up, up. Towards the top Burning Lust passed me, no doubt having arrived late. Then I was surprised to emerge on a road. It was Sha Tin Pass.

Fifty metres ahead I thought I saw something with a torch disappear into the shiggy. “Are you?” I called out to Burning Lust, for who else could it be? I could see the torch through the trees, about waist height, but its bearer remained strangely silent until I got closer and realised it was the reflecting eye of a massive boar. We eyed each other cagily, then he shambled off into the forest as I slunk off up the road.

Tight Lips (LSW scribe): Memorable 360 degree  views at the top overlooking both Shantin and Kowloon. Meanwhile, Lost in Translation was muttering something about where was Hopeless when he was needed… as we circled the hilltop looking for the on on. This was followed by endless steps down, which split up the pack a bit (this was when I lost the pack) and finally onto a good contour trail. 

Trail then took the Wilson Trail down towards Sha Tin. I hadn’t seen a single check up to this point (although to be fair the hare had put in some check backs that I hadn’t visited), nor had there been any shiggy. But then an unexpected right turn off the Wilson led to a nice shiggy trail that went down to a forest road. Here, too, was a check, but I knew the way for I was on Liberace’s out trail – who, unsurprisingly, was first back – and had a simple run in to the finish.

Tight Lips: The steep bit at the end that we were warned about by the Hare never materialised. Perhaps that was meant to ward off the slower runners…  but it must have worked because everybody was back by the time I got to the bins. 

LSW were going for their customary on on at the Sha Kok daipaidongs, so Hopeless and Eunuch agreed to conduct a short circle with a handful of down downs each, but as sometimes happens it took on a life of its own and half an hour later we were still going strong. Good run, good circle.

Tight Lips: Thanks for tons of icy cold beers and crisps – set up by NNT side. After combined DD’s by Hopeless, Septic, Golden Balls and a few from the circle, the LSW contingent sauntered across the road to the food market –  although many of​ the NNT hashers remained drinking in the park!  – Golden Balls / Gunpowder Plod / Tight Lips

Hare: Oranguwank

Runners: Eunuch, Penile Dementia, Liberace, Gunpowder Plod, Geriatric, Golden Balls, Golden Jelly, QT, Gin & Vomit, Willy Wanka, Hopeless, Lost In Translation, Comes Up The Rear, Burning Lust, Rooted, TV Tits, Tight Lips, some others…