Ping Ping Ping
So after a two-decade hiatus, hare 69K came out of N2TH3 retirement to set us all an old skool run. Despite clear maps being sent out by the hare raiser and posted on the web, around 50% of the pack decided to go to a completely different start point, with the excuse that that was where the last Yuen Long run started, thereby delaying the start. Eventually the stragglers relocated to the start, the Golden mobile was parked and beer disgorged by the frenzied 50% that had been waiting for 30 minutes.
Then it started. Golden Jelly announced that she had been unable to get ice on the way and Big Moany wasted no time in martyrdom and volunteered to forego the run, get some ice and monitor the beer temperature and flavour whilst the rest got on the way. For some unexplained reason Liberace decided to join BM as he shuffled off into the Yuen Long alleyways. Meanwhile the hare gave a quick briefing about markings – neat arrows, untidy arrows, checks, no check backs, blah, blah, blah……The imminent approach of other runners was mooted but sod it. It was 8 o’clock and they’d catch up.
Finally the pack headed off out southwards following arrows on the pavements. A few moments later Liberace appeared from the other way; no ice but some steam rose from beneath his collar as he muttered curses and returned to the start to collect his shit. The trail then swung east and we ducked and weaved our way through semi-familiar trails, clear markings and the occasional check. The FRBs moved at a decent pace until the tricky check. Penile Dementia was 50m behind as I checked right over the bridge and called trail. It went cold in a large parking area. After running round and round the village and temples and returning to retrace the known trail Crème Brulee and Stingray appeared. At the far end of the village Crème spotted an arrow and once again we were off at a healthy pace but no sign of PD. A few more checks and we were heading back again into the featureless tower blocks of downtown Yuen Long.
Then pedestrians getting in the way, hindering the hash, how dare they? And that was it, I was no longer on trail in the front, winning the hash, but zigzagging streets to relocate trail. Eventually back to the footbridge and down to A once more following the front runners who were coming in at ground level.
So we then found out that Liberace had done a Captain Oates, Eunuch had turned up late (by 40 minutes) and PD had disappeared on trail without trace. Fartypants and Big Moany were in a wine tasting circle, beers were cracked open and eventually Eunuch arrived spitting blood and demanding a steward’s enquiry about something nobody was the least bit interested in and Penile Dementia manifested himself. The majority pre-empted winter rules and got out of their sweaty shirts and into their favourite comfy tops before the circle commenced.
A relatively short circle ensued followed by the group photo which mysteriously looked as if taken at midday and the pack had been rummaging in the clothing bank again. Fear not though, Luk Sup Gow commented on facebook regarding lack of uniform in the photo, and a short while later Hash Stash announced new black plastic shirts coming! (but hash funds going).
What was that Ping…Ping…Ping…?? Why, it was the GM’s GPS signal bouncing of fdrab concrete structures as he drove round in circles continuously being given directions three seconds after they may have been of any use and never getting any closer to the run start. Eventually our great leader threw in the towel and returned to Kam Tin (from where he could have got to the hash in 10 minutess for five bucks on the red top). – G Spot