Run 1913, 17 April, Yuen Long

Strange Encounters


Swearing at campus I run down the hill to the MTR. The school buses always decide to take a half-hour break just when you need them. Getting to Shatin I take the bus assuming I will be setting off at least half an hour after everyone. Dashing into the park – to my surprise we still have not started running. Liberace is lost as usual, struggling to find the starting location, but we set off running without him. Stripping into my running clothes, I set off quickly, catching up with Golden Balls and Stingray. However I quickly realise I’ve put my shorts on the wrong way. Stopping, hiding from One Eyed Jack’s creepy stares, I reverse my shorts. Clothes in the right direction, the running commences in earnest.

Following the nullah on the right hand side we come across a check. Going left I hear what I can only describe as the most vicious canine that ever existed. I ask Stingray to come check with me. He quickly pushes No Rough Stuff under the bus and runs away in the opposite direction. Turns out the vicious canine is chained up and it’s a dead end anyway. Finding the correct trail we weave through the village, pissing of locals with cries of Trail and On On!! Eventually the village endes and the shiggy begins. The trail leads us through a typical New Territories area of tall grass, graves, small houses and dogs. At the base of the hill I look upwards to see some light shining on the side of the hill. I ask One Eyed Jack whether it’s a hasher or some lost sod. He informs me Catch Of The Day had left early and is doing the run on her crutches. The group splits up with Stingray, One Eyed Jack, Radio One, and myself going for the full run and the rest turning back. Passing the mad Japanese woman, attempting to penetrate the hill with her crutches, we get to the top of the ridge line. Unencumbered by dogs and checks I run ahead and lose everyone.

The run continues along the top of the hill. The view down into the city is fantastic. One could almost call it breathtaking, assuming one had been punched in the stomach and lost one’s breath while looking at the view. Abiding by the laws of physics (Fuck you Newton!) the trail eventually goes down. One final check in a village sends me left. Wandering through the maze of houses, the trail spits us out by the nullah once again. Predictably the trail leads us to the loving embrace of cold beer, hot food and above-room-temperature wine (Fuck you Gibbs!). Next rambos in are One Eyed Jack, Stingray, Radio One and Liberace, roughly in order of arrival. Liberace tells us to pick up the Mad Kamikaze Cripple at the base of the hill. He and the Walky Talky set off in the van to try and get the Bloody Minded One.

So a quick review of the wimps misadventure. Golden Balls did a short walk around because he cannot get wet. Something about being Frankenstein’s monster and the glue will fail causing his limbs to fall off. Side note to the side note: GB also saved the day and got beer due to Eunuch not being able to make it. Velcro Lips and No Rough Stuff walked a fair way up the hill before saying fuck this and going back. Not entirely sure what Dram and T-Bird did but it did involve not going up the hill. So at the precise time of “bloody late” we recovered the Grand Mattress. Holding to the Bushido code she refused liberace’s van, safe choice, and finished the run. Liberace went home due to it being officially “bloody late”. The circle was completed like a 10-year-old completes his homework, without desire or care.

Down downs:(What I can remember)

69K for personal circle

GM for causing a late start

69K for personal circle

Possibly Sam Miguel and myself. Her for being dressed as a cougar myself for being young

69K for personal circle

Stingray for being a coward

69K for personal circle

Liberace lookalike for being able to unable to read a map

69K for personal circle

Fartypants for wanting to go to bed

69K for personal circle  – Green Head Penis

Hare Walky Talky

Runners Dram, T-Bird, Velcro Lips, No Rough Stuff, Radio One, One Eyed Jack, Stingray, Liberace, Catch Of The Day, Green Head Penis, Golden Balls

Non-runners Fartypants, Golden Jelly, 69K, Sam Miguel

Bucket Eunuch failed so Golden Balls attempted to get beer and dropped it all in the road while attempting to carry several crates at once




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