Too Tasty For Yer
To hare is human. To forgive this debacle impossible.
At least the third attempt by hare QT to perform in an area crying out for a decent run. If what we do in life echoes in eternity then the bones of run 1934 are indeed doomed to rattle on into eternity. Maybe even longer.
7.30pm. A reasonable crowd assembled in and around the pagoda at Sheung Tsuen Park. Unusual to see Golden Balls clutching a half empty bottle of Tsing Tao (that’s not unusual—Ed), but this was before the run. Several chest-puffing peacock-strutting septuagenarians heralded something as infrequent as a Dram wallet sighting…wait for it…a NEW RUNNER!!! In sports bra and figure-hugging bicycle shorts she cut a dashing figure. We’d need to be on our mettle to impress. Sadly Camilla didn’t drink and it was as obvious as the balls on a tall dog that by evenings end to her we’d still look like the fat balding ugly bastards we were. So it goes.
Off we set at break-neck speed down the road towards Kam Tin then plunged left into the villages and farms. A brief sighting of the infamous Sek Kong water pipe then around and around and around – back onto the same trail and around and around and around. For me the high point was the very satisfying shite taken half way around. Did anyone do the full run? I didn’t think so. Perhaps Jason and one or two others.
Radio 1 returned admitting she’s been daft enough to do the split where the right-hand option looped back on to the trail leading to the split. Not once but twice.
Back at the pagoda Golden Balls was clutching himself, a new bottle of Tsingtao and dreaming of sheep. He hadn’t run. He’d been SP. So it goes.
A speedy circle ensued and it was off to Tasty House for a curry and more beer. A great turnout that saw the reappearance of a sharp dressed Stringfellow with daughter Jasmine. Dram’s sparring partner Harold also joined the throng and was rumoured to have been something to do with the appearance of our new runner. But what do I know. I doubt she’ll be back – well if she’s stranded in Hong Kong, perhaps.
With the help of Messers Vin Der Liu and Carl Sberg the evenings earlier farce was soon forgotten. A green aura of bonhomie prevailed and all was good. God was in his heaven.
As the clock struck midnight we fell into Stingray’s luxurious BMW and were driven home with the stars winking through the sunroof and the strains of some ’80s techno-shite on the stereo. Crisis? What crisis? ON ON — Fartypants
Hares QT, Golden Balls
Runners Eunuch, Liberace, Creme Brulee, Serbian Bomber, Stingray, Jason, Dram, Gunpowder Plod, G-Spot, Jasmine, Walky Talky, Fartypants, Mango Groove, Karina, Radio 1
Non-runners Harold, Stringfellow, Golden Jelly
A kung hei to all the hashers who summited Fuji on Monday, 2 September. Take a bow, Jessica, Josh, Dingaling, BJ, Electrolux, One Eyed Jack, Pushover and Catch Of The Day. Honorary mention to Geriatric who made a heroic attempt.